How did I get this far behind in my life? I’ll tell you how. Computers. They may speed everything up, but they sure slow everything down when they don’t cooperate. A program I have to use to get something done for a client keeps closing itself if I add data too fast. If I didn’t want to do it FAST, I’d do it by hand. I’m not going to mention the program because I bought a smidgen of stock in the company and I don’t want the price to go any lower because of my complaining, but I’m very VERY frustrated that I have to type slowly or risk losing everything. I Save about every 30 seconds to make sure that, when the program crashes, I don’t lose too much. Grrrr!
I love computers, and I love the internet. But I hate it when my computer won’t let me get on the internet because my router is throwing a hissy fit for no good reason. It decides out of the blue that my laptop (a PC) and my desktop (a Mac) shouldn’t speak to each other. They were cooperating and enjoying each other’s diversity a few minutes ago, but now they’re slamming the door in each other’s faces. In order to share files, I get out my trusty little Toshiba thumb drive, but it’s just not the same. It’s like sending carrier pigeons from one to the other.
I could go on and on if I could think of anything else computer-related to gripe about, but I’m too preoccupied with the lousy golf game I played today. I got invited to be in a tournament and I don’t play that great so I’ve been getting up at the crack of dawn and trying to practice so as not to embarrass myself.
Why don’t I JUST SAY NO to golf? I would have played just as well today if I’d taken a broom and tried to sweep the ball toward the green. On the fairway my ball would not go more than a few feet, but on the green I’d barely tap it and it would streak across the whole green, roll up over the little mound in the back and bounce into a sand trap. I had 8’s and 9’s and 10’s and even an 11 all over my scorecard.
This public humiliation went on for 18 holes, or nearly 5 hours. The course marshal kept asking us to hurry along, but you can’t go fast with scores like that. I lost enough balls to start a driving range.
The hardest part was trying to keep up a cheery front, because it just makes everyone else miserable when a golfer moans and whines about how bad they’re playing. Or they say something like, “I played a great game yesterday, I don’t know what’s wrong with me today.” Or, “I parred this hole last time I played.” Nobody gives a flying rip what you did every other time you played. It does not make your partner feel better to know you played your “A” game yesterday but brought your “B” game to the tournament.
My partner and I would have gotten the boobie prize if there had been one. She stunk as bad as I did, and she’s a much better golfer. My lousy shooting was rubbing off on her. I’m sorry to go on and on, but I just needed to mope a little.
If that wasn’t enough, I had to take my dog to the vet where I dropped a hundred bucks because she is itching so much she’s leaving tufts of hair all over the floor. It looks like we have black shag carpet. Turns out she’s got seasonal allergies, which meant I needed a bunch of special shampoos and a subscription to doggy Benadryl.
Remember me blogging about giving the dog butter a while back? She LOVES it, so someone is always giving her a little butter treat. The vet looked at her blood work and said, “Your dog’s cholesterol is elevated.” Nobody told me dogs get clogged arteries. Do they get strokes and heart attacks? Wonder how much that will cost.
I have other whining but this is one downer of a blog, and at the risk of running you all off with my tales of woe, I’m gonna stop now and see if I can get the internet to cooperate and allow me to post.
Then I’m going to drown my sorrows in a bag of Cheetos. That’s the company I should be investing in, especially if I get invited to golf anymore.
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